Ways to Kill Juliet
by Darkwing333
Summary: I hate Juliet. I hate her with avengence. If you do too, read this story! It is very satisfying!
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** If I owned Lost I would get rid of Juliet!

**Author's Note:** This story is written by both Freckles-101 AND Whirlwind-2005. You should really go read Whirlwind's stories, they are the best. That, and she is my sister. So go read her stories.

**Warning**: This story is only for those that despise Juliet. If you are one of those Juliet-Jack-Lovers. Get out of this story now and never let me know you were here! If you despise Juliet like I myself do, leave me a note via review and let me know. Then at least I won't think I am the only one out there who hates her!

Enjoy the story and review!

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**Ways To Kill Juliet**

1. Sawyer mistakes her for a polar bear.

2. Drowns while doing dishes in the ocean.

3. Give Kate a gun. Or Sawyer. Or Sayid.

4. Sawyer's "stray" ping pong ball hits her in the head.

5. Attacked by a Medusa spider.

6. The Monster gets her.

7. Blow her up.

8. Burry her alive.

9. Burned in a fire.

10. Push her off a cliff.

11. Prod her into the path of a mud slide.

12. One way ticket in the VW Bus down hill… with rocks at the bottom.

13. Sacrifice her to Rousseau.

14. Hit by lightning.

15. Learns that sharks have teeth.

16. Tortured by Sayid.

17. A bore gets her.

18. Bubonic plague.

19. Broken leg.

20. Bolder rolls over her.

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More chapters to come. If you loved this story, or even just liked it, **please review**. 

If you have more ideas on how to kill Juliet, let me know and they will appear in the next few chapters. Thx!


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note:** This story is written by both Freckles-101 AND Whirlwind-2005. You should really go read Whirlwind's stories, they are the best. That, and she is my sister. So go read her stories.

**Thanks to all my Reviewers!:** You guys are AWSOME. I am so happy that everyone liked this story so much. Thanks for taking the time to let us know and give me some wonderful ideas that i used or modified to put into my and whirlwinds' story.

Now here is another chaper, i hope everyone likes it as much as they did the first. 

**Enjoy the story and review!

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**

**Ways To Kill Juliet**

1. Locke has one too many knives lying around.

2. Sawyer has too many guns lying around.

3. Jack has too much Morphine lying around.

4. Get her pregnant.

5. Give her a taste of her own medicine.

6. Gets the 'Sickness'.

7. Gets a paper cut. (hey they can be lethal)

8. Bitten by a snake.

9. Coconut falls on her head.

10. Trampled by a wild horse.

11. Allergic reaction to poison ivy.

12. Plane crash lands on her.

13. See that lake over there…

14. Mysterious conversation with Kate. No one can find her afterwards.

15. The Others come back to silence her.

16. Arrow through the neck.

17. Strung up in a tree.

18. Was that food poisoned?

19. Ooops… I thought you were my dad.

20. Her tent spontaneously combusts.

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Thanks for reading! Leave a review... each one is cherished. Also leave any ideas on how to kill Juliet and i will be ever greatfull. The more creative the better!


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note:** This story is written by both Freckles-101 AND Whirlwind-2005. You should really go read Whirlwind's stories, they are the best. That, and she is my sister. So go read her stories.

**Author's Note 2:** All the ways to die in this chapter are true, even the ones that don't sound like it. Don't laugh! I am serious. I did a little research on the weirdest ways to die and I came up with a few of these, although i couldn't fit them all on so they will be on in the next and last chapter.

**Thanks to all my Reviewers!: **You guys just keep making me want to write more.

Now here is another chaper, i hope everyone likes it as much as they did the first.

**Enjoy the story and review!**

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**Ways To Kill Juliet**

1. Appendicitis is BAD.

2. Operating in non-sterile conditions are too.

3. Infections are even worse.

4. Hide all the antibiotics.

5. Betray Jack's trust.

6. Then lie to him.

7. Try to kill one of the Beach goers. They didn't let a plane kill them, like they would let Juliet get away with killing them.

8. Go exploring. I dare you.

9. And take this water bottle with you. -Sweet smile-

10. The Hatch implodes with her in it.

11. An Earthquake.

12. A Tsunami

13. A Flood.

14. An Avalanche. Hey, if you can have Polar Bears on the island, maybe some day they will have snow.

15. Strangled by her t-shirt while getting dressed.

16. Cavity. All Dharma food!

17. Nose bleed. Wonder who hit her?

18. Bladder burst because she didn't get to the bathroom, errr, bushes on time. Seriously this can happen.

19. Aneurism. She was thinking up a lie to hard.

20. Heart attack. But that would imply that she had a heart!

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One or two more chapters to come, as long as I can keep thinking of rediculus ways to kill her. If you liked this story, **REVIEW**!! 

If you have more ideas on how to kill Juliet, let me know and they will appear in the next few chapters. The sillier the better! Thx.


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